November '11

I am SO overdue to give you an update on what's been happening with me. There have been too many days I am simply overwhelmed. I have full intentions of updating this blog, then sit in front of the screen and my mind goes completely blank. Focus & concentration & short term memory loss continue to be an issue for me. I'm learning to cope but, believe me, it is NOT easy. Maybe if I'd been born a "B-type".....!!

I'm up very early this morning - on a steroid "high" (yuck!) and couldn't sleep. Had a chemo treatment yesterday, so this will be a difficult week, as it usually is following a drug session. My CT scan was, once again, good news: the tumors have shrunk a little bit more. The CT scan results was not as dramatic as the one from 3 months ago, when the tumors had shrunk by 50%. But shrinking is far, far better than growing!!

To tell you the truth, I thought the earlier CT scan was a fluke. So, while Gordy was flying really high on happiness, I was more reserved and, frankly, almost disbelieving. But after receiving the most recent CT results, I knew it wasn't a fluke and am really pleased!! Go figure, huh??!!

I've mentioned, in past posts, that I'd had balance issues and had fallen (hard) three times over the past year & a half. My right knee was pretty bad and I was almost always in pain. I had to be aware 100% of the time where I was putting my feet. Everyone has their own "Enough is Enough" point, and I hit mine right after Labor Day. Went in to the surgeon, had an MRI on the knee and scheduled arthroscopic same-day surgery. I'm now 5 weeks out on having had the surgery and BOY! am I glad I did it. He sez it takes 3 months to heal completely, but at least I'm not hurting like before. GETTING OLD IS NOT FOR SISSIES!!!

I've finally accepted the fact that I will never, ever, be the way I was two years ago before I was diagnosed. My "new normal" is alot of ups & downs. So, I may have 4 or 5 really good days, then 1 to 3 days when I'm so fatigued, i can't do much. I go to the Minneapolis VA hospital on Thursday mornings from 8 to noon and volunteer in the Oncology clinic. I absolutely LOVE it, and have met some wonderful people there. It inspires me, as well as makes me know how lucky I am that my lung cancer was detected earlier than most. I wish I had more energy to volunteer more than once a week though. Maybe next year....

I want you to know how very, VERY much it's meant to me to receive your cards, Email messages and phonecalls. This whole experience can be very isolating and my world has definitely shrunk. You've been wonderful at letting me know I'm not forgotten, and I thank you!!!

Of course you've all heard of Steve Jobs' (Apple) passing recently. Did you know what his last words were? In her eulogy, his sister said his last words were: "Oh wow, oh wow, oh wow". This further convinces me that there is a God & that there is a far better place ahead. It brought tears to my eyes and joy & comfort to my heart, which I hope it will for you too. In the meantime: I AM STILL HERE!!!